My Last Breath
by Impersonating-an-entity
Summary: Song fic to Evanescence's "My Last Breath" from the album Fallen. Touya's POV. TouyaXJin, rated for shonen-ai. Touya's last breath ((go figure!))


Jin, please, hold me this last time. You know I'll be gone soon. Shinobi we are, bound to shadows, flitting, following the darkness. Touch me, touch me, softly, surely, I need you now more than ever, my love. That's all I want to say: all I have time to say. I love you, and because of you, I fear nothing. I love you, my wind, my wonder, my life, my heart. But I can't stay. No, I must go. And I hate to say, I'll not return. Do you hear these words I say? Can you hear me through your grief; can you feel my hands in yours; can you feel me, here, warm in your arms for the last time?!

_Hold on to me love,_

_You know I can't stay long._

_All I wanted to say was I love you and I'm not afraid._

_Can you hear me?_

_Can you feel me in your arms?!_

As the dreaded attack strikes through, and I feel myself fade, Oh god, can I think of nothing else but you?! I hold the final breath for all I can, dreaming, dreaming, in a daze. As I draw within myself, my thoughts are strangely still, yet flashing before me, images of you! O, Jin, my glory, you are me light! You are my implored, wondrous light, and now, this honor-bound suicide ends me for all, but all my mind is devoted to you!

_Holding my last breath! _

_Safe inside myself,_

_Are all my thoughts of you?_

_Sweet raptured light,_

_It ends here tonight!_

There are those things I cherish, to leave behind, torture. How I loved the snow and ice, and Makai's oh so 'bitter' winters! The soft, sweet snow, so delicate and beautiful! In the winter, I will always be present! I'll be hiding in the snow-glazed woods, inside a hollowed tree. Oh, Jin, I'll miss you more than winter's freeze; please, I beg you find me! Join me for those cool, sweet moments when I can once again dwell with the living in my cherished frost!

_I'll miss the winter:_

_A world of fragile things!_

_Look for me in the white forest,_

_Hiding in a hollow tree (Come find me)_

Oh, cursed fate! I killed myself, and in so doing, it seems I've killed you! I would not have chosen it! I had to do so! The mission was fatal, but I was honor-bound! Jin, I do, I love you! All eternity, you've thawed my Ice Demon's wretched heart, and it is yours! I know you hear my declaration; it's in everything about you! Your winds stir, your face is pink with emotion, your tears' salt even reflects it! How bitter sweet your tears are, Oh, my Jin, I know you hear me, I'm so sorry!

_I know you hear me;_

_I can taste it in your tears!_

Death approaches, I feel it colder even than my ice, what shock! For the first time, I shiver, and my last breath is held, in hopes to stave off death, and rejoin you! Trapped and safe within my mind, all my thoughts pivot on your face, your laugh, your humor and love! Can I think of nothing else to devote myself so wholly to, my beautiful wind master? My light, my life, my star! I pray to you, for I can know no other God! This is my last night; I only wish you were here!

_Holding my last breath! _

_Safe inside myself,_

_Are all my thoughts of you?_

_Sweet raptured light,_

_It ends here tonight!_

I see the fitful way you sleep; your eyes shut tight, to block out the world. Your hands are clasped, begging the unseen Lord of Night's Illusions to draw you once again to our realm. And he brings you to me, and we rejoice; yet still, the stillness broken, the fragile ice shattered, the wind subdued, and from the dream, you awake! Awake to a nightmare – I'm gone, and there's no one else! Oh horror, can I not give you a savior? Must you be as cold as I was, as dark and alone? I see you shudder, Oh, if I was there, my love!

_Closing your eyes to disappear,_

_You pray your dreams will leave you here!_

_But still, you wake and know the truth;_

_No one's there!_

So tell the dark, embittered world goodbye, and night! Sayonara, to all it's bleakness! I'd prayed better for you! Yet none comes! So end your suffering! Don't fear! Please, don't be afraid, I will protect you, forever! And still, you call me, still you beg for me, and gladly I come, as everything falls away into darkness. But I won't let you fall!

_Say goodnight!_

_Don't be afraid!_

_Calling me, calling me as you fade to black!_

Breathe your final prayer, your final rite, final goodbye! And I hold my breathe as yours sifts out, and release as you do, let our sighs be one! Don't fear, I don't, I am safe within my own thoughts and dreams of you, oh, join me; make them not dreams and thoughts! As you call my name, as you join my world here away from it all, my thoughts are focused on your voice, how you beg for me as I come on winged feet of spirit! Are you all I see, is it yet true?! My wondrous love, you light my world, does it end here now? "Hikari!! Ai Shiteru, Sayonora!"

_(Say goodnight!)_

_Holding my last breath! _

_(Don't be afraid!)_

_Safe inside myself,_

_(Calling me, Calling me!)_

_Are all my thoughts of you?_

_Sweet raptured light,_

_It ends here tonight!_


End file.
